Soul mates do everything together... and other love myths for knocking down
5 myths of romantic love that we must demolish
Couple love tends to be idealized to the extreme. Just as the media and
advertising show us perfect bodies and happy people, there is also a
Unrealistic depiction of romantic relationships.
The central myth of contemporary love is this: there is a perfect better half
waiting for you somewhere, destiny will make you reach her and you will know that she is the person
correct. It sounds very nice, but the reality is that half oranges do not exist
Our decisions have an enormous weight on the type of individuals with whom we interact.
relationship, questions nearly continuously emerge some time recently moving forward in a relationship and the "happy forever” is more of a long-term commitment with all sorts of feelings
and situations, positive and negative.
How do these myths affect us? Some of the false beliefs that are ingrained in
the legend of romantic love lead us to neglect fundamental aspects of
relationship, because we take them for granted, as if 'true' love were a
guarantee that passion, interest and harmony will be maintained for life.
Obviously, if this does not happen, we feel that we made the wrong choice, when, in general, we do not
has as much to do with our initial choice, but with the fact of how we take care of it and
we cultivate over time.
Below I reveal five of the most frequent myths that I face in
consultation:
1) WHEN THERE IS LOVE, SEXUAL ATTRACTION IS CONSTANT AND SPONTANEOUS
We all know that when we leave behind the infatuation period, the frequency
of intimate relationships also tends to decrease, and yet many people continue
love, but now we will have to actively work to keep the
flame of passion, as well as promoting spaces for eroticism and taking control very
aware of our sexual dynamics.
2) LOVE MEANS GUESSING WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THE PARTNER
Not all the love in the world is capable of turning us into fortune-tellers, nor all the
rapport counteracts the fact that we are still two different people,
with contexts, stories, ways of thinking and expectations that will never be
exactly the same.
As if this were not enough, we all change and evolve over time. assume and
presuppose are, without a doubt, the two great enemies of communication as a couple and of
objectivity. It is better to ask things that 'seem obvious' than to leave room for the
bad interpretations.
3) IF THERE IS LOVE, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE ATTRACTED TO ANYONE ELSE
Love does not make us immune from being attractive to other people. we are beings
humans and nothing can prevent certain individuals from triggering our interest
romantic or sexual, even when 100% committed to a relationship.
What we can do is prevent a fleeting attraction from escalating and
turn into an infidelity,
through communication, trust
and above all,
cultivating a good intimacy and complicity inside the bedroom and outside of it.
4) LOVE IS ENOUGH FOR THE COUPLE TO SURVIVE
This is probably one of the most harmful myths, because it leads us to take
irresponsible decisions
in the heat of the moment, thinking that, as there is love,
The rest will automatically fall into place on its own.
The reality is that no healthy long-term relationship survives without values and
compatible life expectancies, without economic tranquility, without personal growth,
without quality time, without good intimacy and without a huge dose of mutual respect.
5) SOUL MATES DO EVERYTHING TOGETHER
When two people do absolutely everything together, we are not dealing with a couple
perfect, but before a dependent. Individuality, mystery and distance
occasional are essential elements to maintain the interest, the spark and the
admiration.
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